i can try for your heart

this afternoon, at a quiet, intimate ceremony, melissa margaret freudentheil and caleb joshua johnson wed. only their closest family and friends were there. she looked exquisite. her bridesmaids were perfect - beautiful without detracting from the bride and emotional without wrecking their makeup. everything was wonderful. i cried like a baby.

congratulations brother caleb joshua and sister melissa margaret johnson.

the moon has nothing to be sad about

tonight we had our first snowfall. i think it will be gone by morning, but right now it looks gorgeous. i was only inside for about an hour, and when i came out it was dark and everything was lightly blanketted in white. it's pretty much the only day of winter i genuinely love. i'm going to have to put aside some money for snowboarding this year so i have something to get me through. either that, or actually have a toboganning party instead of just talking about it.

my favorite things about my job

• writing on the desk
• knowing people's names and hearing their voices before i ever meet them
• my ridiculously socially akward boss
• freecell on the sly
• my rolly chair
• having a reason to get out of bed in the morning
• using the headset just because it makes me feel professional
• re-organizing and colour coding the files
• exceeding my fellow employees' low expectations
• 'zooming' (a little inside, i know)
• reliving the glory days of dial-up internet
• coffee
• the huge calculator

let's go away for awhile
you and i

to a strange and distant land

where they speak no word of truth
but we don't understand anyway

holiday
far away
to stay

on a holiday
far away
let's go today
in a heartbeat

heartbeat
heartbeat

don't bother to pack your bags or your map,
we won't need them where we're going

we're going where the wind is blowing,
not knowing where we're going to stay

heartbeat
heartbeat

we will write a postcard
to our friends and family
in free verse

on the road with kerouac,
sheltered in his bivouac

on this road we'll never die

something worth writing home about

it's my assembly this weekend, and it has been pretty much fabulous. the pioneer meeting was yesterday, and it was beyond great. it was exactly what i needed. the theme was 'trust in jehovah' and i have a lot to learn about that. muy encouraging.

and today was fantastic. from assembling with my recently adjusted circuit to seeing two from my hall baptized, from planning a trip to vegas to a wonderful evening of dinner and knitting with my newest pioneer partner, monica. and then, to top it all off, the most incredible northern lights i have ever seen.

i went out to do my papers.

that's right, my paper route. i have a paper route. and i'm cool. and i was delivering them two days late. cause that's how cool i am. i only delivered them at all because it's the assembly and i would have felt guilty ditching them.

i amaze myself.

anyhoo, i went out to do my papers, and was mesmerized by the lights. i ended up laying down in someone's yard at about 11:30 this evening watching them dance all over the sky to a soundtrack of radiohead and jack johnson. the colors were spectacular - it started as just the usual bright green, then faded to white which whirled around like smoke, then began rippling green, white, blue, and hot pink. it moved quickly down the sky in circles, spreading from a single point to the horizon. i completely understand why people would have thought the gods were appearing to them in the sky. it was intense.

confined and confused

truly insane people don't sit around wondering whether or not they're crazy.

they have better things to do.

a cassette tape of stalker songs

due to popular demand, here i am posting. i haven't felt inclined to lately, because i'm not sure what direction i should take this thing. originally it was used to record and report my mexican adventures for my fans back home. now, however, i am back in canada, and have few adventures that need reporting. so, as i have been asking myself about most facets of my life, now what?

and i guess that's about where i am again. stuck in no man's land. undecided, noncommittal, up in the air. where should i live? where should i work? what should i do for work? where do i want to be in five years? how am i going to get there? should i try to get back to mexico? should i focus on somewhere else now? should i learn a new language? which one? or should i just give up, live at home until i can drag some lame guy to the altar, have a bus load of children, and live in pg for the rest of my life? no offense to those who have chosen or will choose to do that...

'how comely are the feet of those who declare good news of good things'

this weather has me wanting love more tangible

so the reunion is officially cancelled. i really could have used it. it breaks my little heart, but i guess i'll live. i'm trying to figure out a way to get to the district convention in mexico in august, but seeing as i'm still mostly unemployed, i can't imagine it will actually happen. we'll see.

it's my convention this weekend. it's gonna be great. i was mad cause it's so early this year. i know that's a stupid reason to be mad, but it just feels wrong. then i got a copy of the program, and now i can't wait. it looks like it's going to be scrumtrulescent. and i've been reading my proclaimers book about all the landmark conventions in the 20s and 30s. what an experience they would have been. to witness rutherford's 'advertise, advertise, advertise' talk, or to stand proudly with the great crowd of other sheep, finally understanding your role in God's organization, or to support the resolution to go by the official name 'Jehovah's Witnesses'...

i wonder if in the future people will look back at our time and think about how thrilling it would have been to be a part of it. i suppose they will. but i wonder what things will stand out to them. maybe the release of books like 'draw close to Jehovah'. that's a good book. or maybe all the prophecies that we're finally clearly understanding... daniel, isaiah, hosea, amos... all of'em. they just don't seem as, um... enthusiastic in our day. i'm gonna work on that for the next convention. for any new announcements, releases, or resolutions, i'm going to leap to my feet and cheer, instead of just applauding politely.