better than robert redford bars - mexican style

i'm in mexico. i'm here. unbelievable.

the trip was long, and a little emotional. i wish i could say i cried, cause it would make me feel like you would all know how much i appreciate you and miss you, but i didn't. i came close a couple times, but no cigar. that doesn't mean i don't appreciate and miss everyone in pg. it just means i'm not much of a crier. i did start to get scared on the drive down to vancouver. i started thinking 'what am i doing!? i've never lived on my own, i've never lived in a foreign country... what makes me think i can do this?! i really have no concept of what i'm getting myself into!' but once i got on the plane i was ok. actually, my fears melted the closer i drew to mexico.

it's hot here. i'm talking about 30 degrees. and humid. it's the humidity that takes some getting used to. it's tough, but i'm learning to deal with it. ;) actually, one of the hardest things right now is the noise. it's constant. there's always mexican music playing outside, and people yelling, and that kind of thing. i'm just not used to it. when i try to read or study, it makes it difficult to concentrate. but the people are great. everyone i've met has been so nice.

erin young met me at the airport, and she was also picking up john and karen evans, who arrived moments after me, so we all drove into town together. that night i got a facial from erin's study, edna, the sweetest spanish girl. we have a deal where we help each other with the languages. she's teaching me spanish and i help her with any english she's not comfortable with. i have to say that her job is a lot harder than mine. her english is great, and my spanish is less so. much less so. after that we went to george's (pronounced horhay's of course) for the best quesadillas in town, or so i have been told. they weren't the seafood ones, which i'm dying to try. apparently those are only eaten for lunch. but they were pretty fabulous. and the drink was really interesting... some sort of rice milk with cinnamon. i really liked it actually.

the next day i met up with mikaela evans. her and brandon babcock (the other guy staying with joe and erin) showed me all over mazatlan. i met more people, looked at a couple apartments, saw the beach where they go surfing, and took a glass elevator to the top of a resort to get a fabulous view of the city. the sims, a family in the congregation, had some people over so i could meet them. we played games and had pizza. also fun. *note: mexican doritos are the weirdest tasting things i've tried so far.* we were there late, and i didn't have a ride home, so i stayed at evans. i love sleepovers.

yesterday there was a congregation get together for an australian family that's leaving, charlene, bernie and levi. it's too bad they're going, cause they're really nice. but they say they're planning to come back. probably long after i'm gone tho. there was loads and loads of shrimp. and they are massive. and delicious. we were at a resort or apartment complex of some sort that was directly on the beach, and had a pool. so we walked down to the ocean. my first time on a mexican beach. unbelievable. and we swam in the pool. when that was over some people went to rico's, a coffee shop they go to all the time. we played another game, where everyone reads a card and secretly votes on who they think is most likely to do what's described. i got no votes for "all bark, no bite" but the most votes for "most likely to be taken away by aliens to be their leader." and this was before i revealed my fear of babies. so i suppose they are getting to know me pretty quick. also at rico's there was a guy named juan paublo that played guitar and sang. he did lots of radiohead and other good stuff. he was great. and erin young sang with him for one song. she's amazing. apparently she used to sing with a group. she has a very powerful voice. talented beautiful woman. and she rides a motorbike. my newest hero.

everyone else my age is an adult while i am merely in disguise

hours til mexico: 35

i'm leaving for vancouver in an hour. i haven't slept, and i guess i'm not going to. i think i'm done packing. i won't really have a choice soon. i'm still burning cd's. i better listen to these when i get there, because i have wasted plenty of valuable time making them.

i'm too tired and burned out to be coherent, let alone interesting. next time i write, i'll be in mexico. :)

for those who belong nowhere and for those who belong to no one too much to belong anywhere else

days til mexico: 2

time flies when you're having fun.

she likes to keep to herself but i would also like to keep her

days til mexico: 3

another party in my honor. a classic martini party at monica's. all the attention and hugs and presents the past couple of weeks are a little overwhelming. my friends are too good to me. but i don't mind.

a big fat congatulations to melissa margaret freudentheil and caleb joshua johnson who managed to shock their friends (especially me) by getting engaged this afternoon. it takes a lot to make me cry, but i bawled like a baby. my li'l girl is growing up. i'm so proud... *voice cracking*

the edible suitcase

days til mexico: 4

that's only three days of packing. but i'm not feeling too stressed anymore. i'm trying to focus on spending time with the people that are important to me before i go. i'd hate for my family's last memories of my leaving to be me crabby and stressed out. and i realized that everything is going to be fine. so what if i don't get everything perfectly organized. if i forget something, i'm sure i can survive without it. and if i can't, then i suppose i'll buy it, or have my mom send it to me.

last night my congregation had a "surprise" party for me. i'd known about it for weeks, but it was still great. actually, it was kind of a surprise, cause i didn't realize how many people would be there, or that so many people cared that i was going. i mean, it is only for four months. it was really... heartwarming... you know, cheesy words like that... to realize that my congregation cares about me so much. it was absolutely wonderful. *sigh* let's all take a moment to relish the blessing of our christian brotherhood...

plus, they made me a cake that looked like a suitcase. these people are great.

o pirate

days til mexico: 7

you know who i big fat love? melissa margaret freudentheil. big fat love. i genuinely wish that i could marry that girl. that way i could have her with me always and forever. or maybe i could shrink her down to doll size, and carry her around in a little genie bottle. then i could pull her out whenever i missed her and she could do her silly little dances and such and cheer me up. or maybe i could clone her, and keep a version of her all to myself. any suggestions as to how i could accomplish one of these? perhaps i should start a fund.

wouldn't it be nice if we were older, then we wouldn't have to wait so long.

days til mexico: 9

single digit.

i spent a wonderful day with kandis. it was our last day just the two of us. we went in service, and shopping, and for dinner. it was absolutely fabulous. i love that girl. i made her try on a wedding dress so i could come to terms with her impending marriage (which i am going to miss... *heart breaking*). she looked gorgeous, of course. it made me tear up, if the truth must be told. i can be a sentimental fool at times, it seems. and dinner was great... especially the conversation. and that had to be pretty darn good to compete with the incredible food we enjoyed. i love intelligent, spiritual conversations with people i love. they restore my faith in people, and reassure my fears about my friends. i just want what's best for them, like any friend. and the best is serving Jehovah, to the best of their ability and circumstance. and to hear their goals and plans, not just including, but focussing on their spirituality... well, it makes me grin like a fool.

i'm kinda motherly with my friends... i think it stems from the control freakishness.

my violent side comes from my mother.

don't let your dreams be dreams, you know this living's not so hard as it seems

days til mexico: 10

we had our first snow fall last night. there is nothing more romantically beautiful than the first fresh snowfall. everything is hushed and clean and sparkling. and it always happens at night. those are the moments that paradise will be made of.

the following twenty-four hours of snow, however, have not been quite so magical. at first i was excited that i was still here for a little bit of snow. that lasted approximately fifteen minutes. after that, i was ready to fly out immediately. i already went in the ditch. this morning, on the way to the group. apparently i have no tread left on my tires. hm. no harm done though. and it wasn't the first accident of the season... kandis confessed that she bumped into my car last night. morton's fine, but franchesca (i've decided i like that name best) is a little bruised.

the past few days have been pretty eventful. it's starting to dawn on me how soon i'm leaving. there's been so many goodbyes already. i am now officially unemployed. i went in to work tonight, and there was already someone there covering my shift. that was a relief actually.

and on saturday we had a mexican fiesta dinner. just had some of the people over that have encouraged me the most over the past few years. it was nice. great food. and monica brought me a pinata. that was the highlight of the evening. i think the concept is genius. i got to beat a tiki head with a large stick until candy poured out. then i ate candy until i felt sick. it was fabulous.

and on friday i had my very first pioneer meeting. it made me wonder (even more than usual) why everybody doesn't do this. the information was beautiful and encouraging, and the atmosphere was so positive. Jehovah's spirit was definitely there. unfortunately, i was still horribly sick, and spent most of the afternoon hacking and snorting, which was lovely. especially for the people around me, i'm sure.

consuming too much honey can cause a person to develop strong mystical, esoteric beliefs around a central female figure

since i have decided to no longer use my blog for whining about being sick or stressed out, i'm just gonna go to bed. (wild cheering all around).

goodnight.

i like songs about drifters - books about the same. they both seem to make me feel a little less insane.

days til mexico: 16

i'm still stinkin' sick, but at least i got a nice big day in service. me and kandis and kim did bus stops downtown. i much prefer their territory for that. there's way more people. and i got to watch the video of our bethel tour last year. that was great. i forgot how great it was. i must go again one day. maybe for good.

i'm off to make myself yet another hot lemon and honey with extra rum.

superman is dead

i slept all day, and i'm sicker than i was last night. not impressed. i don't have time to be sick. the only good things about having a cold are watching tv and drinking hot lemon and honey with rum. and since i don't have time to watch tv, i'm making up for it with extra hot lemon and honey with rum. ok, mostly just extra rum.

there's intelligence behind the cars, but not behind the stars?

the assembly was fabulous, of course. i got to watch my parents and my brother up there today. they did good. i was so proud.

then we went for dinner and to the hockey game. i love hockey games. i love yelling and cheering and dancing, and wearing my mittens. that never fails to please me. speaking of never failing to please... monica and louise are crazy fun. they constantly amuse me. all i can say is, i will never look at a stencil or a funnel the same way again.

The days get shorter and the nights get cold. I like the autumn but this place is getting old.

the only thing that really got me through work tonight was the knowledge that it was my final weekend shift. *sigh of contentment* plus those creepy old drunk guys that hit on me gave me a flower. that was kinda nice.

i'm in this strange transitional mode, where i'm waiting for things to start happening in my life, and i feel like they're so close, but i can't do anything until they do happen. like i'm stuck in limbo, or susupended animation. all my time is spent obsessing and preparing to leave. only twenty more days til mexico. then it should all start coming together. i'll have my own place, and lots of room to explore. and no job to hinder my fun.

yay for not working.

time for bed though. it's far too late to be up... i have my assembly in the morning.

yay for assemblies.

i will be in mexico three weeks from today!!